Vietnam Letters #33

Postmark 17th March, 1970

James Street
Berridale 2628

16th March

Dear Jock,

I was pleased to get your letter. I got it on 12th so it came nice and quick. So glad to know that you are OK. I guess you will be looking forward to your little break it will be nice to get a few days home and be out of it for a while. Sandra and the boys arrived back last Thursday. I am glad they got back OK. The boys were very pleased and excited to be back. On Friday Paddy O’R went to Canberra for the swimming. We went. It was a lovely day. Paddy did well but just missed going to Sydney by 1 & 1/2 seconds. He was a bit dissapointed because they had announced that he was picked then when they checked on his time he just didn’t make it but he may next time he is only young. Poor Old <illegible> was burned on Friday. He made 89 years so he had a good <illegible>. <illegible> will be lonely now as she has no one left.

I had a letter from Joan the other day. Kerrod will soon be in his march out. I think they are going up but but it is only 2 & 1/2 hours drive so it’s easy. Have you seen anything of John G? I suppose he will soon have his leave. I haven’t heard anything of the <illegible> for some time.

We are starting to get the cool nights and mornings now so the winter won’t be far off I suppose. <illegible> Bartell got a new truck the other day. It arrived and was on show at the Cooma Show. Father has ordered a new land-rover it should be here in a couple of weeks time but the old one is getting a bit tired. I got your license fixed up in Cooma it was due you have to tell them where you are and they don’t have to have the Signature.

I don’t know anymore news and father is going to the office so I’ll say cheerio. Lots of love from us all. Write when you can.

Love from Mother.

Postmark 18th March, 1970

14th March

My Dearest Sandra,

How are you Darling? I hope you have settled back into our little home by now, and you are not to lonely. To-day we haven’t moved an inch, just laying back and having a good rest, but at the same time we are in an ambush position. I don’t think there is anything I want you to send over at the moment, I have plenty of tea as the Infantry get one Australian ration pack in every four days, and as I am the only tea drinker in my section I have plenty of tea, thank you dear. I’m afraid most of the time to come I will be in the bush after every three weeeks we get two days R&C at Vung Jau, then one day in camp, Nui Dat to get ready to go bush for another three weeks. It’s not too bad, except that it gets that hot and we don’t have that much to eat as we have to carry six days rations on our back, and as you can imanage at the start of the six day we have quite a load on. Sandra I too pray every night to God to help you get through these times whilst I am away. I also ask him to protect me so we can be to-gether for the rest of our lives. I love you Sandra.

I hope you can read my writing OK, as I find it very hard to write on my knee, I seem to get very shaky. Every six days we get our mail in on the re-supply run, and that is the only time to get mail out unless there is a chopper in for some reason or another, it must be afull for you when you only get mail now and then, for me it’s not so bad, as I know it will be so many days Before it’s mail day. How did the old car go for you on your way home, I hope she went OK for you. By the way how many payments are there due on the old girl now there shouldn’t be that many to go now and it willl be ours. How is the hair pencil going for you, I suppose by now you have quite a few done, but at the same time Sandra, hair on no hair you are the only one for me my love. I suppose the boys have changed a fair bit since I last seen them, I only hope they be good boys for you untill I come home anyway. I suppose you have the slides by now, if so what do you think of them, some of them weren’t to bad are they. I often wonder if you have had your hair cut since I left or are you going to grow it long until I come home to you my love.

What do you think about me and the army Sandra. Will I try and get out when I go home or stay in for a while longer, I am not sure what to do as after twelve to eighteen months they could possible send me back over here, and I sure don’t want that to happen, from now on all I want is to be with the one I love, where the money comes from I don’t care as long as I am with you Sandra.

Sandra you will always be mine won’t you if I thought you would never want me anymore I would never get home from this place, you may think it funny me saying a thing like that, you know me, never at home, leaving you for so long, I know it’s not very fair to you but I love you and need you as a young mother needs her baby. I am a very jealous man Sandra you know that, I try to control it but I never succede. There is always that something inside of me that keeps telling me you are to good for me and one day you are going to wake up to me and leave me. I know that you are quite pretty, buitefully really and I also know that other me can see your beauty and this is where it gets me. I think that other men are better than me and that you should think this way too and so I get very annoyed and jellious and this is the reason I didn’t like you going anywhere, anywhere at all, I even used to try and talk you out of going to Mass for this reason, Sandra please forgive me. You know darling there were times when I used to wish that you were ugly so that no man would want to look at you, but the funny thing is before we were married I used to be proud of you (I still am by the way) to be with me and for other men to see the beautyfully woman I had with me, but for a couple of years after our marriage up until I joined the army your beauty used to annoye me and make me jelious. I am so sorry Sandra just because of my foolinish I have made so many unpleasant times for you. I still think you are very buitefully and have a bute figure, and your legs, when I look at your legs darling I always get arroused even sitting here in the middle of Vietnam and just thinking about you and your legs I get aroused. Sandra I love you and always will, I shall do anything to try and controll my jelious feelings and make your life a little more pleasant. Sandra I hope you understand what I have just written, I have always wanted to tell you about this but I was never game to, as it sounds so silly, but please understand dear, I think you are just it and very buitefully and the thought of other people enjoying your beauty made me mad. I guess you married a verry foolish, selfish and jelious man. Darling I ask you onece again to forgive me and try and understand. I love you more than I have ever loved anything and to think I let my foolishness get between my loved one and myself. I love you like no woman has ever been loved before please always remember that my love.

I don’t know when I will be able to get this note posted but I guess it will be at least 2 or 3 days time. Shall finish up for now, hopeing this letter finds as much love for me as it has for you Darling.

Yours always, loving you until the end of time,

Lots of love,

Jock. xx

Postmark 19th March, 1970

14th March

My Dearest Sandra,

How are you my love. I suppose you are still lonely and wish we were to-gether as I am very lonely too. At times I think it won’t be long untill we are to-gether, and there are times that it seems like years untill next Christmas. I can hardly wait untill May when my R&R leave is due how I am waiting for that time, every night I think of what we will do in that week and how good it will be to be able to hold you in my arms again, Sandra you have no idear how much I love you, you mean everthing to me, everything. Darling in the letter before this, they should reach you the same day, I hope you can understand what I have told you, I love you Sandra, just pureley and simpley in love with you, you are the only woman I want, and I want you, please believe that, without you my life would not be worth liveing, you are all I live for dear, even though we are so far apart.

Have had a few quite days lately and I really enjoyed them no walking around and plenty of sleep, so I am starting to feel my old self again, but ever so lonely for you my love. I hope to get some mail from you this afternoon when we get re-supplied. You have no idea what your letters mean to me over here. I suppose by the time you get this letter it will be getting near Easter, so Darling I will wish you a happy and holy Easter and my God Bless you my love. Unable to get any cards dear so please understand, but I am always thinking of you my love. Now that you are home I hope everything goes OK for you, and that everyone leaves you alone, if they do start to annoy you just simply tell them that you know what you are doing, and live how you want to live. Sandra if ever you think you will need any extra money for anything please let me know and I will arrange for you to get more, but it may take a few weeks to reach you. No more time to write as chopper is coming in. I love you Sandra.

Love and kisses,

Jock. xxxxx.

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