Evil Alisandra in Wonderpark II. 5. Eggs from the Cuckoo”s Nest

Woden Hospital

My escape involved just not going back after my leave, as I suddenly realised it was much better at home than in the lock up. So I researched my options whilst driving past the Aboriginal Tent Embassy and Old Parliament House, as by that stage I was over my time and I had a feeling I would be up for a couple more injections and another stint in HDU if I returned – so I didn”t.

The elders at the embassy gave me fish and vegetable broth, but the tent pole fell on my head (almost killed…), so I visited (ran to) the sacred flame and straw hut and sucked up some good spirits with the eucalyptus shaman leaves (looks like a … wand?) that just happened to be there.

The elder was concerned she”d given me coffee as it doesn”t agree with Epilum (laughing.. not cos I”d seen a snake on the tent behind her – must”ve been Dreaming Day). This didn”t stop the Crisis Assessment Team (CAT) and police from picking me up a couple of days later for, yes – another HDU stint and then another in PSU.

Nothing changes in Civic (city centre) and most clubs were closed today, well Mooseheads was anyway. King O”Malley”s (KOM) was the same and I managed too many cigarettes. I wonder how many patient patients playing patience there are in mental health lock up today….. not worth going there.

CAT team popped up from nowhere last night – didn”t help that I”d had a few drinks, well a glass of wine (terrible) anyway. I”m sure I”m allowed (I”d better check…). Anyway they reckon a visit a week.. oh woe. I suppose when I’m employed they”ll lay off and I”ll get (will try) my syko Doctor Bruce to get the hounds off my back, as he put it last time, although he wasn”t successful, and anyway he thinks I”m egocentric and individualistic whatever. His surname sounds like…. (makes people think I”m delusional
in Kung Fu land)…. oh yes Nurse Ratchett.

Bumped into Dr Bruce late night in PSU (Ratchett not in sight) – some chick was trying to kill herself by holding wrists under hot water thing on wall and moaning. Inconvenient as she was blocking the fridge with my sandwiches in it so I told her to move, then get back to killing herself – had to twice, as I forgot my drink but hey, I”m in there and supposedly as crazy as her. She ended up with ECT (shockwave therapy) I think and another stint in HDU – oh and she did get back to killing herself with the same mournful moan to attract attention.

As for Merley well she should”ve been in aged care and tried to escape out the front door when I was coming back in from leave – rather painful to watch as she had no hope – but hey they had left her sitting in one chair all day moaning away in pain (well they think her foot) – as for her exit on the trolley, glad Rails and others saw it all that night. What a noise and I”m
supposed to be rehabilitating.

Three or four various attempts at suicide – lame if you ask me as I saw the results of each unsuccessful attempt. You need to cut wrists lengthwise etc and use the elasticated sheets. And right now I”m sitting here wondering if too much smoking will get me in the end but I doubt it very much………. whatever.

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One visitor (friend) remarked how remarkably it was not unlike the Cuckoo”s Nest movie thing I”m sure you get the picture….. fun when they can leave and you have to stay not knowing when you”ll be let out all down to a couple of doctors every few days and their five minute assessment of your mental state… But they don”t see it that way.

Not fun and not legal probably but who”s got time to worry about breaking common law and human rights when all you want to do is watch a DVD or live in your unit without spending days looking around at the other maudlin characters locked up – at one stage it was like a circus (surprise) but they had a few of us in there and with not much wrong with anyone except we had no freedom.

They were watching our every move in the courtyard through their office windows – well someone was cos they knew what I”d been up to – how about cameras….. then it got to the stage I was losing weight and surviving on that Ensure milk without many solids as the food was so bad.

Anyway the weight is back on now was 41 kilos in there. Some of the characters became too boring for words. One I think was verging catatonic and his inability to fill out the meal menu even surprised Wheelchair John. I saw him on his bed with nurses with a drip then in a wheelchair which indicated some kind of ECT shockwave maybe… just guessing.

Jehovah (from first PSU visit and really good artist) spent most his time asleep or crying – how do I get out of here etc. Not good when you”re feeling the same but I knew I wasn”t as pissed off as him and he”s had years more of it than me. I”ve seen him after one ECT not good.

Have escaped ECT myself I think ;]… as it can be involuntary – they sedate you first (surely not). Oh and apparently they’ve been taking our eggs and it”s not even Easter. I suppose bunnies can fly…

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