Culturazi

Hullo,

The Melbourne identity race that seems to stop a nation is on again and it is one that has a particularly laid back Bart man loading the field. Now it seems that since the Japanese came over here and blitzed the field with two stable mates, strategy, not just about riding but also about the journey has become paramount. Now I don’t necessarily know what I am talking about but my track record is pretty impressive and I can site one trifecta and a quinella from the Cup as well as a myriad of almost made it’s and many hangovers.

The Melbourne Cup is probably the last chance you will have to make a buck before Christmas.

Interest rates are announced a half hour before the race (WHO CARES?). Apparently that will add another sixteen dollars to your average six hundred thousand dollar mortgage every month. And you wonder why people quibble about money. It’s definitely not because they are tight. It is because they are selfish.

You know, how lucky are the homeless in a way that they do not get caught up in this mythical numbers game? And while I am at it, I would like to acknowledge the unemployed who have an extra forty hours a week in which to earn whatever they need to live on. And how good is it to be able to cross international borders without a passport.

But back to the race. Now I would like to think that the bookies who set the odds have a couple of no hopers running favourite, which is usual as there are no real no hopers running and supposedly that is what makes this a hard race to pick. So what you need is to start ruling out who won’t win. now there will be horses that are hard and fast track lovers and some like the mud or a slow track.

November at Flemington, it seldom rains and the fact we are in the grip of drought should give you a clue, so get rid of your mud runners, as they are known in the TAB. This is a group one race over a mile and has the best horse flesh with the best jockeys so it would be unlikely to put an apprentice on board, so rule out apprentice jockeys.

The trainers have reputations attached to their status so stick with the big three; Dave Hayes, Gay Waterhouse and Bart. These trainers are consistently winning so why change for this. Now we don’t like to see Aussie things like the Cup going off shore so we don’t normally give the overseas horses too much as their preparations are stifled through travelling, so you can take them out of the equation or else you are un-Australian.

You should be left with about five or six horses that could win and now you should look at the names, colours, as well as the numbers and then roll a dice, consult tarots, or just pay the mortgage and be done with it.

Luff, Chiffon

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