Gertrude’s Diary #149 – Awkward and Uncomfortable

A small list of things that make me awkward and uncomfortable.

Last week I was a passenger in a taxi and English was not the first language of the driver and I told him to take the next left and when he said “Left here?” I said, “That’s right”.  Then I thought to myself, “that’s kind of confusing isn’t it, when you think about it.”  So I decided not to say it next time he asked, “Left here?” and then when he did ask again I said “That’s right”, exactly the same way.  That made me feel awkward.

When I am in the presence of musical or artistic genius (except all the musical and artistic genius who I already know and am friends with – phew! close save there), I get all tongue-tied and babble incoherently, which is awkward, uncomfortable and embarrassing for everyone involved – kind of a natural disaster of social unease.  That is what happened when I pod-casted recently; curse you Fun Machine.  You shattered my fragile facade of urbane sophistication and left behind a starry-eyed automaton whose only purpose is to spread news of your talents to the wider public.  Anonymously.

I hate it when I’m in the office and telecommunications marketers call and ask,  “Can I speak to the person in charge?” in that peremptory and impudent manner that they have.   As I occupy a support role to a collection of autonomous, locally-based, non-hierarchical community groups, how am I to succinctly answer this question?  This made me feel awkward until I decided to say, “He’s working in his other office at the moment; you can reach him on 6277 7111.  Ask for Kevin.”  Then I felt jubilant, which is a lesson in how you can use your neurosis to achieve small, insignificant victories.

For more instructional and inspiring glimpses into the life of Gertrude, look out for a soon-to-be-published, glorious full-colour illustrated, personally autographed edition of highlights of my blog, lovingly photocopied and stapled together in magnificent, quality, recycled A4 format.

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