Recorded on Tuesday 31st May, 2005, Insatiable Banalities, podcast #11 sees regular crew Johnboy and Jim Boots host the other members of Jim’s band Caution Horses: Graeme Bayles, Leo Rose and Beth Tully.

Scroll below to see the track list and a summary of the insatiably banal topics of conversation.

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Track list

Tables and Chairs, Mercenary Touch. 7:22

Caution Horses (live), Love is Better. 19:49

Caution Horses, Angels Love Trees. 29:44

Caution Horses (live), Seven Year Itch. 48:00

Caution Horses (live), Sleeping Dogs. 1:01:09


Graeme Bayles, Caution Horses’ mandocellist , reveals both his lineage and his antiquity by bringing in an old cassette tape, perhaps the last remaining copy of a demo recording by Tables and Chairs, a band he formed in Canberra back in the eighties. It has that unmistakeable eighties sound and the tape hiss is very comforting. There are a couple of glitches, drop-outs etc on the tape, nothing we could do about it unfortunately.

We play a track called ‘Mercenary Touch’ which is, as Graeme explains, about his continually wandering eye and guilty conscience. There ensues a little discussion on the music of the Eighties compared to the Nineties, Johnboy being firmly in the Nineties camp, Jim seeming confused about which decade was which, Graeme and Beth having stopped listening in 1988 and Leo, who pipes up from the corner, hasn’t listened to any music since the late Forties.

The band breaks into song with a rendition of Jim Boots’ composition ‘Love is Better’. You can hear a much better version of the song here. We discuss the problems local venue Toast is having with noise complaints. The town centre’s future as a ‘lively cosmopolitan urban village’, as touted in the various development proposals currently abounding, seems unlikely to eventuate if the laws on noise pollution are not reviewed.

Caution Horses are recording a CD and we hear a demo version of their song, Angels Love Trees. Johnboy then expresses his gratitude to Jim Boots for his article on female ejaculation which saved him from an embarrassing faux pas during a one-night-stand recently.

During a discussion about the awful phrase ‘significant other’, Johnboy feels compelled to deny peeping on Jim and Beth having sex (doth he protesteth too much?). Jim Boots reveals the location of his secret web cam, and his plans to start a sex blog. Beth is not amused.

Big Brother and reality TV comes up. Johnboy thinks they’re all fixed. We flay Schapelle Corby for a while. And the Indonesians. Johnboy recommends importing hydroponic pot growing equipment to Bali, if the pot is so poor there that people want to smuggle in good Aussie buds. Then, following the longest intro to a song in history (over which the ranting continues unabated), the band plays Seven Year Itch.

The band now gangs up on Johnboy, his respect for such luminaries of Nineties music as Pearl Jam receiving short shrift. They move on to Rap, Techno and R&B, no doubt alienating a huge slab of the audience. Missy Higgins? Hooray for melody. Delta Goodrem? Hooray for pretty mediocrity. Perhaps she requires a Michael Hutchence-style fling for credibility. Jim Boots offers his services.

The band plays a final live song (Sleeping Dogs), and after issuing the, so far spectacularly unsuccessful, postcard challenge once again (send us a postcard at PO Box 4332 Hawker, ACT, 2612, Australia), we say goodbye.

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