Gertrude’s Diary #64 – Gloomy

Gertrude's Diary

I’ve already written a Gertrude’s Diary about writer’s block, so I’m unable to rattle off a piece on the subject foremost in my mind.

I suspect this particular episode of”the block”arises from the fact that I have serious and weighty matters on my mind, and am thus unable to muster my usual light-hearted and”irreverent observations.

So in contrast, this week, I’m going to go for gloomy.” Gloomy and fictional and let’s just see where we end up.

It was a dark Monday morning.” Very dark.” So dark, in fact, that you might believe that the sun had not risen at all.” If you did believe that you would be right, because it was only 4 hours past midnight.

Walking through the darkness was a young man.” He had been walking all night.” The moon had sunk and only the distant stars brought any light to his wanderings.” There was a cold fog which wrapped itself around his lightweight clothing like a funeral shroud.” He was chilled to his marrow.” Also, his kidneys, liver and gravy.

Just as he neared his destination (a lonely and neglected clapboard shack in the middle of a disused railway yard) a figure leapt out from behind a rusted water-tank.” In horrible contrast to the shadows of the surrounding area, the stranger had vividly coloured red-hair, large red-shoes, and garish, yellow-striped overalls in between, and he was lit by a blindingly illuminated letter above his head.

“Howdy little fella”, the strange figure cried, “this is your lucky day because I’m going to convert this ugly industrial wasteland into a drive-thru restaurant, where you can work”split-shifts on public holidays”for minimum wages, eat cheap and nasty food, and never have to walk through the night again for whatever strange purposes have propelled you thus”.

“Ah ha”, the boy replied.” “You have been fooled by my hopeless and dejected appearance, for under cover of darkness I have been liberating factory fowls and feedlot cattle from the clutches of evil, greedy, crazy, fucking freakoids like yourself, and even now they have assembled in an eerily quiet and frankly threatening army right behind you.”

And the chickens pecked the clown and the cattle tore his ugly clothes from him and the boy turned the old disused railway yard into a beautiful community garden and drop-in centre wherein he went on to meet many wonderful and enchanting people who enriched his life in inumerable ways.” And sometimes he still went walking in the night and felt a bit gloomy, and that was okay too.

The end.

2 Responses to “Gertrude’s Diary #64 – Gloomy”

  1. And then the owner of the rail-yard re-developed it as medium density housing for yuppies with lingering bo-ho aspirations.

    Sometimes they threw a few coins to the now broken man.

  2. But then, the broken man became a journalist and was able to use his bleak world view to generate some cold, hard cash.